The MOTHER of all messes

So my Saturday starts off quite normal...I decide to make my menu plan and grocery list for the week.  I start by getting out all of the flyers, my trusty iPad and my favourite menu planning app.  Then I'm off to the pantry to see what I have, and it all goes down hill from there.  I open the pantry doors and realise that I have 5 half boxes of spaghetti, 3 open boxes of rice and some soup that has been outdated since 2011... it's soooo time to CLEAN.  I empty the entire pantry onto the island and start the purging process.  It feels good to declutter, and I've been meaning to do it for a LONG time but can never seem to make it a priority.  Well today, I made time.  After a little over an hour I had a relatively clean Pantry...so much so that I made room for all of the stuff I had to store in my laundry room.  So I'm off to the laundry room to retrieve the blender and food processor to bring it back to it's new home.  As I am emptying the shelf in the laundry room I decide that I no longer need it in there so I take it out and see a dust bunny the size of my dog...so, I start cleaning that room.  I'm reorganising, and purging and feeling good....I finish in the laundry room and head back into the kitchen where my island is still full of food and my pantry is still not quite finished.  (Keep in mind that this entire time my 3 kids are home and playing in the house because it is pouring rain)  So off to finish the job that I started, and now that I'm exhausted, it takes my twice as long and it runs into bedtime for the kiddies.  I get them settled and in bed and come out to face the mother of all messes....the "mom's been busy doing things other then her NORMAL routine" mess...picking up crayons, and Lego's, toys and clothes...not to mention the mess of the bathroom...you kind of look around thinking that someone is playing a joke on you because you've been in the house all day and swear it didn't look like that 5 minutes ago (I guess selective sight is the only thing that allows a mom to get anything else done) So cleaning it is....and after all of that...I sit on the couch and think about how my day went...and it hits me....I still don't know what's for supper tomorrow night :(

Old dog...new tricks

So little miss AR decided that she wanted to take fiddle lessons. I am all for that. I'm so happy that she wants to learn to play an instrument and the fiddle of all things. Then she drops the bomb on me..."But I want you to learn with me". Oh my...How can you say no to that? We want our kids to try new things and to feel like they that can do anything they put their minds too, and what better way to show them then to try and learn the fiddle at 34years old...So, fiddle lessons it is and let me tell you, this old dog ain't gonna be easy to teach. Wish me luck :)

Sorry you missed it

Supper time...why do we stress so much about it. Why do we feel so guilty when we decide to take the easy route every now and then. Yes, I am a stay at home mom so I am home all day (yeah right) and I have no excuse to not have a giant 5 course meal ready every night...but sometimes you just don't feel like cooking. Sometimes you just don't feel like cleaning all those dishes...again. So, I've taken it upon myself to implement a Pancake and Smoothie night 4 times a month ( sounds better than once a week...lol). And I don't mean mean homemade pancakes...I mean the open the box and add eggs and milk kind( and throw in a little flax meal for good measure).

So next to the sign that says " my house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it" I will need to have one that says " I cooked a huge healthy supper yesterday, sorry you missed it".

So, pass the syrup, cause this momma ain't cooking tonight :)

It's Potty Time...

Well my ten day potty training marathon has come to an end.  My third time around I figured this would be a piece of cake.  I was armed with candies, stickers, a 30minute timer, new underwear, a full bottle of tide and a couple cases of Clorox wipes....I would say that I was READY...

It was a long, frustrating 10 days.  My washing machine never worked so hard and my floors were never cleaner, but I was not giving up.  I was determined to have LD potty trained before his 3rd birthday if it killed me. So we pushed on.  I had all three kids involved, dancing our own version of the potty dance when we were successful and giving him "the talk" when we weren't...

Well, I am very excited to say that I will be buying another pack of DIAPERS tomorrow...

It's about the little things...

Well March break is almost over and although we didn't plan anything big this year with the hubby away, I decided to do some "little" things with the kids.  It was all about making MEMORIES...

It was about staying at a hotel, even if that hotel was only an hour from home, because it had the BIGGEST water slide...

It was about staying up WAY past bedtime to watch movies snuggled in bed...

It was about eating all of our meals together, even if some of them were fast food, or PB and J

It was about watching my baby jump into the pool for the first time without someone holding his hand...

It was about having desert BEFORE supper...

It was about falling asleep from EXHAUSTION...

It was about leaving the dinner dishes on the table and taking the dog for a walk...

It was about my 5 year old getting stuck on the elevator BY HERSELF, because her little brother peed on the floor and mommy had to run to get him...

It wasn't about how much money it cost, or how far from home we went, it was about being PRESENT for the "little" things, because what we consider to be "little" will have the biggest impact on who they will become...

(it was also, a "little" , about using the POTTY...)

Slowing down time

It happened...that moment you dread from the moment your little boy is born...the moment you know is gonna happen but hope it never does....the moment he GROWS UP

It happened last night right before my eyes.  He was getting ready to have a shower and came over to me and said those dreadful words "Mom, can you buy me some deodorant?"

I looked at him like I saw a ghost...I had visions of him going off to college and walking down the isle.  I didn't know what to say, my mouth was so dry I couldn't speak if I wanted too...I grabbed on to the wall to hold myself up and looked at my handsome little man and just nodded.  He smiled and skipped off into the bathroom oblivious to what I was screaming in my head.

How did this happen.  How did he grow up so fast without me even realising it.  It's like you see them through baby coloured glasses and then little things happen and it's like a punch in the face.  So of course I did what every mother would do in my situation...I started to look through his baby pictures.  I needed to see when it all happened and how I missed it.

 There it is...there is no denying that my little boy isn't so little anymore.  So I guess I will have to suck it up and buy him some deodorant, start packing his stuff for university and order his tux.

 And then I hear this voice from the bathroom, this sweet little voice saying "Mom, can you help me turn on the shower?"  and I realise that I still have time :)

The Phantom Cleaner

About a year ago, I decided to hire someone to clean my house.  It was AWESOME.. it was so nice to have someone do all of the things you hate doing and never seem to have time to do.  However, I've come to realise that the fact that she was here to clean was only a small part of the overall experience...Because it was then that I was introduced to, what I've aptly named...the Phantom Cleaner...you know the one that only shows up the night before the cleaning lady arrives...

The one who sweeps the floor just enough so it doesn't look like you live in a pig pen when she arrives but not so much that she knew you did it.

The one who would pick up 90% of the toys in the kids rooms and leave just a few scattered throughout and strategically placed behind doors and under the beds...

The one who would clean the counters in the kitchen and then make a toast so as to create the perfect crumb pile that made it looked like it was only there from breakfast instead of the pile that was actually 4 times that size a few hours ago.

And the one who would pledge just enough so you couldn't write your name in the dust on the end tables but not enough that you could see  your reflexion...

Yup...the Phantom Cleaner.

 So it dawned on me that I actually didn't really need the cleaner to come after all...I just needed to think she was coming...so I am posting this as a job opportunity for someone who will threaten to come and clean my house so that the phantom cleaner will appear and get the ball rolling....

Anyone???

Amanda

Revenge

My son AEW is 8 years old and is OBSESSED with LEGOs.  We have bins FULL TO THE TOP with them plus who knows how many in drawers and in the closets.   Every occasion when you ask him what he wants the answer is and will always be... LEGOs.  Every trip to Walmart ends with a walk to the Lego isle and, more often then not, a new Lego.

He impresses me with every "thing" he builds and makes up with these tiny pieces of plastic.   He would much rather sit on the floor with a bucket of LEGOs then watch TV.   I watch him put together a 230 piece Lego set in under 10 minutes.  And as I watch him I am thinking wow...I  love these things, I love that he is using his imagination and being creative...I love everything about them and the fact that we probably could pay for his first year of University with what they cost doesn't seem so bad....until...

 I step on one.

There is nothing like walking into his room, barefoot,  minding your own business with an arm full of folded laundry ready to be put away and then WHAM...It is like you've been hit by a bus.  The clothes goes flying. You are now hoping around on one foot...biting your lip, silently screaming  profanities in your head watching your once nicely folded laundry slowly fall to the floor. And in that split second you want revenge on these brightly coloured pieces of plastic... You have visions of throwing every Lego you can find into the fire and watching them melt slowly... it is a pain like no other...

And the worst part is that they are everywhere...It doesn't matter what room I am in, or if there is only one lonely little Lego on the floor...I will step on it.  It is like they have it out for me...

Prisons need to learn this technique for interrogation... you want the truth out of someone...lock them in a dark room, barefoot and dump a box of LEGOs on the ground...they will be begging for mercy...

We should start measuring pain from 1 to stepping on a Lego instead of 1-10.

When you want to win a fight, just tell the other person..."I hope you step on a Lego" and walk away...

But then, the pain subsides, and as I am picking up the clothes off of the floor and folding them AGAIN I look up and see all of the "things" that AEW created that day, and it makes me smile. And I my anger slowly dwindles away...

So I don't throw them onto the fire, but I do get my revenge (insert evil laugh here) Every time I sweep the floor I know that there will be a number of them in my dirt pile and I pick up all but one ... that last one, that last little pain inducing piece of plastic, I have something else in mind for it... I "accidentally" forget that it's in there and very quickly sweep it up and throw it out..I know it is only a small victory but it acts more as a warning to the others to be careful because any one of them could be next.

And on that note...I'm off to sweep my floors

Amanda

But, But But....

But it's Bedtime.

 It is my most stressful time of the day.  I wake up in the morning already dreading those 5 little  words.

"It's time for bed guys"

Especially since my hubby just left for a month long hitch ( oil field lingo). So I am officially a 'single parent' for the next 30 days.  And it is hard and rewarding all at the same time. We miss him.  I miss him. I miss having the extra set of hands around especially at BEDTIME. Because I know that as soon as those words leave my mouth I will be greeted by the "BUT"s

"But, I'm still hungry"
"But, I'm not tired"
"But, my show isn't over"
"But, But But..."

One person against three "BUT" equipped kids can make for a very stressful hour...but  however, it is one of those things that you can't change...so I take a deep breath and begin...

"What do you want for night snacks?" Nobody knows...they know that they are hungry, I've told them what we have, but nobody knows what they want...so after repeating everything that I see in the fridge and in the cupboards and threatening to send them to bed with no snack they all of a sudden realise they want toast and a fruit plate. ( the first thing I offered to make them)

Then it's off to get washed up for bed(don't even get me started with that process).  I finally get everyone settled in their beds. They are able to read for a bit while I read to the baby, then I do my rounds and bring water, give hugs and kisses and turn out the lights. And I sit down for the first time all day.

Wouldn't it be nice if that was the end of the Bedtime Story...but no. It begins ,the barrage of little feet.  Perfectly timed so they aren't up together.  And before I can even see who is coming around the corner I say "get to bed!" and then that 3 letter word I've come to loathe...BUT

"But mom, I need a drink"(which they already had)
"But mom, you didn't kiss me goodnight" (which I did)
"But mom, I can't sleep"
"But mom, I have sore legs"
"But, But But..."

BREATH....I get up, get everyone settled again and wait...I'm scared to move, scared to make a sound until I know for sure that they are all sleeping...and I don't dare sit down because I know that as soon as I do they will know...and then it happens...SILENCE.

I  very quietly make my way in each room, turn off nightlights, tuck them in, kiss them (again) and for a brief moment I consider waking them up because the house is too quiet and I miss them already...

BUT I don't, because I know that in 24short hours, I will have to do it all over again :)

Just a few dirty dishes...

Girls...oh my nerves.  I had a 2.5 hour show down with my 5year old over her washing a few dishes.  Can you say ATTITUDE?  There was no way she would budge and no matter how many things I threatened to take away, or how many times I told her she had no choice in the matter, she would not back down.  "I am not doing the dishes", "I wish I had a different Mom", "I hate living in this house".  Did I mention that she is FIVE?  I thought I was going to loose it...I had visions of taking every dirty dish(all 8 of them)and putting them on her bed!!!!  but I didn't...I let her sit on a chair in front of the sink for 2 hours...2 hours!!   My son even came out and said "mom, I will do the dishes for her", but at this point it had nothing to do with the dishes and everything to do with not letting her get away with the ATTITUDE. 

The funny thing is that in the midst of all of this I am looking at my little girl and I am proud of her...I am proud that she isn't afraid to speak her mind, that she is willing to go the distance for something she believes in and that she is not a pushover...I can see her little personality forming and I can see glimpses of an adult version of this 5year old who is passionate and dedicated...but today she is 5 and she still has to wash the dishes...And she did...Not all of them and not well, but they were done and she was happy and proud of herself and I was glad that I didn't back down. We hugged and made up and she was her happy-go-lucky self once again,  making her brothers laugh and acting the fool :)

This being a mom thing is HARD on a good day, but on a day that starts off with the mother of all showdowns...lets just say I'm taking an Advil and heading to bed...well, after I re-wash all of the dishes ;)

Tomorrow is a new day (and one day closer to the teenage years)