Revenge

My son AEW is 8 years old and is OBSESSED with LEGOs.  We have bins FULL TO THE TOP with them plus who knows how many in drawers and in the closets.   Every occasion when you ask him what he wants the answer is and will always be... LEGOs.  Every trip to Walmart ends with a walk to the Lego isle and, more often then not, a new Lego.

He impresses me with every "thing" he builds and makes up with these tiny pieces of plastic.   He would much rather sit on the floor with a bucket of LEGOs then watch TV.   I watch him put together a 230 piece Lego set in under 10 minutes.  And as I watch him I am thinking wow...I  love these things, I love that he is using his imagination and being creative...I love everything about them and the fact that we probably could pay for his first year of University with what they cost doesn't seem so bad....until...

 I step on one.

There is nothing like walking into his room, barefoot,  minding your own business with an arm full of folded laundry ready to be put away and then WHAM...It is like you've been hit by a bus.  The clothes goes flying. You are now hoping around on one foot...biting your lip, silently screaming  profanities in your head watching your once nicely folded laundry slowly fall to the floor. And in that split second you want revenge on these brightly coloured pieces of plastic... You have visions of throwing every Lego you can find into the fire and watching them melt slowly... it is a pain like no other...

And the worst part is that they are everywhere...It doesn't matter what room I am in, or if there is only one lonely little Lego on the floor...I will step on it.  It is like they have it out for me...

Prisons need to learn this technique for interrogation... you want the truth out of someone...lock them in a dark room, barefoot and dump a box of LEGOs on the ground...they will be begging for mercy...

We should start measuring pain from 1 to stepping on a Lego instead of 1-10.

When you want to win a fight, just tell the other person..."I hope you step on a Lego" and walk away...

But then, the pain subsides, and as I am picking up the clothes off of the floor and folding them AGAIN I look up and see all of the "things" that AEW created that day, and it makes me smile. And I my anger slowly dwindles away...

So I don't throw them onto the fire, but I do get my revenge (insert evil laugh here) Every time I sweep the floor I know that there will be a number of them in my dirt pile and I pick up all but one ... that last one, that last little pain inducing piece of plastic, I have something else in mind for it... I "accidentally" forget that it's in there and very quickly sweep it up and throw it out..I know it is only a small victory but it acts more as a warning to the others to be careful because any one of them could be next.

And on that note...I'm off to sweep my floors

Amanda